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How To Build Resilience and Why Resilience is Important [3 Ways to Bounce Back]

By: Natalie Viglione, Disrupt Now

Exploring how to build resilience and why resilience is important is critical now more than ever. Many around the world have felt the impact of the past few years and there's a whole lot MORE change coming, so now is the time to unlock this power within!

What Does "Being Resilient" Mean?

I like to look at words and get down to the most ancient root meaning that we can, because words have lost their brilliance over the centuries (and it's time we RElearn everything!).

My first go-to source is Etymonline and then if I can't find what I need, I'll dig deeper into ancient texts, scrolls, etc. to see how far back I can take a word to find the most original meaning possible. Here's what etymology says about this word "resilient" -

resilient (adj.)

1640s, "springing back, returning to the original position," from Latin resilientem "inclined to leap or spring back," present participle of resilire "to jump back" (see resilience). Of material things, "resuming original shape after compression, etc.," by 1670s. Figuratively, of persons "bouncing back" from difficulties, etc., from 1830.

We can then use this as a basis; being resilient means having the ability and capability to spring back or bounce back after hardships or other disrUPtions. The beauty of the divine power within humans is that we carry the ability to create our reality and course of actions (often called "karma" which is a Sanskrit word for action). We have the ability to be resilient naturally, it's truly part of the human spirit.

You can watch "resiliency" in action with little kids. What happens when a toddler is just learning to walk and they keep falling down? The toddler just keeps getting back up, ignited with the fire and fascination of the capability to walk and will fall down over and over but always get back up. Maybe sometimes hurting their little knees or otherwise, but regardless, always getting back up. That innate ability is in the coding and complexity of the human DNA. Nature carries this same beautiful innate ability, too. You can see this shining (and magnificent) ability in baby horses (aka foals), for example, that are birthed and immediately try to take those first steps...exactly the same process as a toddler!

How Do We Build Resilience?

As noted above, the capability to "bounce back" or to "get back up again" is innate in all aspects of this world, and I would say that it's a superpower of being human (and all of nature has this, too)! One of the most important ways that we build and create resilience in our lives (or careers/businesses- in ALL things) is to welcome moments that we've deemed as "failures" instead of fearing them. Through those moments we can create the ability to become more resilient and each time learn something new. Failures are growth opportunities, so there is no such thing as FAILURE in a negative sense, just moments in time where we get to learn a powerful lesson of what NOT TO DO AGAIN.

With that in mind, here are a few things from my perspective to help build resiliency:

1. EMBRACE AND WELCOME GROWTH OPPORTUNITIES. Redefine success for YOU. Redefine what the word "failure" means as well. If you feel that you've "failed" at something, catch yourself in your thoughts and change that word every single time to "growth opportunity." I have a personal example to bring this thought to life. When I was 23 I got separated from a man I had been with for a few years, and ultimately this led to a divorce. It was hard and many times, at first, I felt like I was a failure and caught myself trapped in that emotion for a few months' time. But, the truth was, I disrUPted my life for the BETTER.

It was a relationship that was a dead end for it was a big mismatch (and luckily figured that out early), and there was nothing honest nor loving about it for either of us, so we got the opportunity to GROW out. Evolve UP and out. I am unsure of what he did with his life after that, but it was a HUGE catalyst that allowed me to get onto the road towards my dreams and out of the stuck place that I was in. About a year after the separation and divorce process, through some of my own methods of healing, I realized how powerful it was that I had that opportunity to see exactly what NOT to do ever again. I got to analyze all the steps I took to get to that past place, and then make sure I never went down that same path again.

In moments like these, it's not like we don't FEEL pain or get hurt, cry, or have anger, etc. etc. We DO feel all those things, but that is a sign that we need to change something BIG in our lives, and then we get the opportunity to GROW through that and to move beyond it.

2. FEEL THE EMOTIONS AND EXPERIENCE THEM ALL, BUT DO NOT GET STUCK IN ANY OF THEM FOR TOO LONG. Emotions and intentions are a couple key elements within the foundation of manifestation here in our realm (click here to read my Manifest How-To Guide), and the magick of feeling ALL the emotions is part of the beauty of being human. (Side note: Did you know that plants and animals (all living things) also feel emotions? If you want to read more on this topic, a GREAT book is The Secret Life of Plants.)

Feeling all the emotions is the part that allows us to explore the depths of a single moment, however, too often people can get stuck in a single emotion and never move past it. It's the person that's stuck in grief, anger, guilt, shame, etc. Or the person stuck in the victim mode not willing to accept responsibility or be accountable for their own actions that caused something to happen.

The point of this is that the beauty of a disrUPtion is that we have the full range of the many emotions, but we have to keep ourselves in check so that we don't get lost in one emotion that takes us into a negative experience or downward spiral in our life.

3. ASK YOURSELF: WHAT'S THE MEDICINE IN THIS SITUATION? DisrUPtions: If you notice, I keep using this word but ensuring that the word UP is noticed within it. When I created this container DisrUPt Now, it was with the vision and hope that people can be inspired to see disruptions (change, chaos, great transformations, etc.) that will require us to be resilient as the catalysts that get us UP and out of where we were, or at least in a place where we have a chance to change a trajectory of some THING in our life. Great change requires massive transformation, and with transformation comes disrUPtions (with the emphasis on the word UP). As a medicine woman, part of my mission is to help humanity remember there is medicine in everything . . .

When something happens that requires us to turn on this resilient switch in our body, mind and soul, a great question to ask is "what is the medicine in this moment?" Meaning, what is this moment teaching me, showing me or requiring of me? There is medicine in everything that happens because there's always something that we can learn or take from that moment/situation that allows us to do something differently or go on a different path. The medicine is the stuff that allows us to heal faster. It takes looking at all aspects -- good, bad, ugly -- to see the medicine and the truth of WHY something happened or is happening. It's about getting real, raw and HONEST with ourselves and everyone else around us.

By no means am I stating that times of great change or tragedy are not hard or difficult. We have to see into all aspects of disrUPtions and embrace all the parts. But, like the sun that rises after the darkness of the night, there is a dawn that comes even in the worst of times. By changing our perspective, this is how we can move through things and even beyond them.

Having clarity during the rough patches and seeing the medicine helps healing turn on faster. If all of humanity could be more authentic, raw, vulnerable, and real about the tough times, we can help each other turn on the resilient factor all the faster, too.

Seek to find the medicine hidden within the things that happen in your life for this is how you rip the veil away to see clearly so that you can unlock your own inner guidance system and the resilient power that lies within you!